Saturday, May 26, 2007
thats the thing man
dont disturb me while i'm busy? i never really understood why.
it doesnt work that way please.
at least not with me.
thats why i never really liked to tell people when i'm busy.. cos they'd assume i'd be too busy and they 'dont want to disturb me' so they're not going to message me or anything. but i seriously feel, that when im busy, all the more i long for your words. i'll check my phone more times and that increases the number of disappointments i get.
so when you're in bmt, i shouldnt message you la since you wont be with your phone the whole day? it's not that i'm trying to like purposely do stuff to set standards or anything, but i honestly miss you throughout the day and just want to say something to you. it doesnt matter whether you reply straightaway or anything, as long as you get to read it sometime. i'm very sure everytime you checked your phone you got a message from me. at least one. everytime. i made sure you never feel neglected. i sms you sometimes and when you dont reply soon, i also take it that you're busy and say its okay, dont need to reply. not trying to make you feel guilty or anything of course, but honestly its okay. i understand :) sometimes like i know you're having mass but i still sms you, knowing you wont reply. or when you're offline i say something to you.
sigh. it does indeed feel better after telling him what i feel. but its no good in a way because i'm pressurising him to message me and all that.. which is not ideal at all. oh well, he's tired and hurried me lol. he's really my frank and straightforward boy.
at least i don't post stuff up, or hint on my nickname right. i tell you straight. why would i want to put our "troubles" public? it should be settled between us. i dont know why you like to do that yourself, and when i ask, you say nothing, you dont wanna tell me. and that is like.. huh? if you genuinely didnt want to tell me, you would keep it to yourself and not write such hints on your nick. its obvious you want me to probe and make me feel guilty.. and you want others to know. sigh dont know you la.
and he's got a chalet tomorrow. wow and i just found out today? accidentally even. he thought i knew already. look at our communication man. i tell him everything thats happening and he hasnt been talking to me about his stuff. how disappointing right. i know im having exams but still! i want to be with him, i want to know about him, i want to know everything, i want to hear from him etc..
i love him so much
i dont get angry with him, i just get disappointed
i realise almost everytime i cry because of him.
and he likes the way i cry! lol how cute of him.
in fact you look nice in a way (hehe) and i like everything about u when u look that way
it's the time when i can love u more
hug and kiss u more
10:39 PM.
